Oral intercourse is one of the most intimate and (when done well) pleasurable acts that you can perform on a woman. Take this as your comprehensive guide to learning the best techniques to giving head to your girl, from how to start, all the way to that big, explosive finish.
Most men don’t even understand the female orgasm, let alone how to make it happen, while some are even afraid to get that close to the equipment down there, due to cultural taboos and misinformation about the taste and smell of the female genitalia.
Put all this aside, and listen: a normal, healthy vagina doesn’t taste or smell unpleasant at all, with many men trying cunnilingus (oral sex) and reporting enjoyment of the act. In addition, men, if you expect your lady to return the favor and put your tool in her mouth, then you’d better have some technique with your tongue, if you catch my drift.
Here are all the tips and tricks you need to take your sex life— and your partner’s pleasure —to new heights:
First: Understand the Anatomy
To play an instrument, you have to learn the various parts of the instrument and their functions, right? The female genitals are no different, and learning what’s where and how it works will serve you well in any type of bedroom scenario.
First, the external part of the genitalia that you might call the “vagina” is actually called the “vulva”. The vulva is made up of the visible folds of skin called the “labia”, and the clitoris, which is located at the top of the structure, above the vaginal opening and the urethral opening, and is partially obscured by a fold of skin called the “clitoral hood”. The clitoris is the most sensitive part of the female body, with way more nerve endings then even the penis. This is why clitoral orgasms feel so good for the woman. Write that down, because we’ll come back to it.
Now, it begs asking: why is giving head to your girl such a useful skill to learn?
Many Women Can’t Orgasm From Intercourse
There’s a myth that has been perpetuated far and wide, that any woman can reach the finish line from sex if you’re good enough at it. But female genitals aren’t as simple as males’, so there’s a lot of variance in the type of pleasure that different women derive from various sexual acts and what they prefer. That’s why with each new sexual partner, you shouldn’t just assume whatever felt good to your last partner will feel good to this one.
While the number is debated, the fact is around 75 percent of women can’t orgasm from penetration alone, so even if you fancy yourself a modern day Don Juan, you’ll probably fall short more often than you get her off during intercourse. This is when you need to use your head— or more accurately, your tongue, to finish the job.
Even if your lady can come from penetration (good for her), many women getting more pleasure from oral sex than from vaginal intercourse, so you’ll still want to master the art of giving head to give your partner a special treat in the sack.
Foreplay
Most men consider cunnilingus to be a part of foreplay, which can be fun, but sometimes it needs to be the main event. In this case, the old adage, “nice guys come last” should be your goal.
Let me preface this section by saying this: foreplay is meant to stimulate your partner, and prepare her for the next phase. You should do what you’ve learned feels good to your girl, whether that’s what she’s told you or simply what you’ve learned through gauging her reactions in bed.
Once you have her clothes off, you should start by touching her lightly in her erogenous zones; the small of the back, her neck and collar bones, her nipples, her inner thighs, and so forth. Some women prefer to start off by being rubbed through clothing or underwear, while others prefer light contact with the skin; ask your partner what she prefers.
Next, you can start kissing and licking her down her body, pausing at a few of those sensitive areas as you go. Keep controlled, slow movements down to her waist and below. As you start to near the target, don’t get overly eager and just dive in. Instead, use your tongue and your breath to create sensations on her inner thighs and legs and slowly circle the area, narrowing into that special spot.
The Act of Eating Her Out
Cunnilingus is just not as simple as what your friends might tell you in middle school; doing the alphabet with your tongue just won’t cut it. Here are all the factors you should consider when pleasuring a woman with your mouth.
Rhythm and Speed
At first you can alternate fast and slow flicks of your tongue on her labia and clitoral area, but in order to finish the job, you’ll have to move faster, and at a steady pace. Most women like it when oral sex is done slower and softer to start, and gradually increasing in pace as it goes on.
Pressure and Direction
You’ll most likely want to start softly as you lick her labia and clitoris in alternating short and long strokes, but as you get into the act, you can apply more pressure in longer strokes. Many men don’t know this, but the part of the clitoris that you can see is only a small fraction of the organ, which is considerably larger and shaped like an arch, the two legs of which are directly behind the labia.
This means that pressure on the whole of the vulva is all stimulating a large amount of nerve endings and licking the entire area is going to be pleasurable to your partner— albeit not as much as the clitoral head.
Use Your Fingers to Help
You shouldn’t have to insert your tongue into the vaginal opening, but if your lady likes penetration with her clitoral stimulation, feel free to use your fingers to do whatever feels best.
This is also a good way to give yourself a break when you start to feel the inevitable jaw soreness. Experts estimate that it takes the average woman about 10 to 20 minutes to reach climax, so even if your partner is quicker than most, you’re still going to feel like your mouth is working forever to get the job done. When your jaw cant take any more, break for about 20 or 30 seconds and stimulate the clitoris with your fingers so that you don’t lose any momentum.
Use Her Reactions as a Guide
As we previously mentioned, there’s no one foolproof strategy to producing the female orgasm, once you’ve mastered the basics. This is where you can turn to your partner’s reaction to what you’re doing for help. If she’s moaning and breathing fast, you’re on the right track. If she’s getting louder, with some bodily jerks and twitches (these are typically uncontrollable) your getting close to the finish line.
It’s important that once you feel like she’s close (or she tells you she is), you don’t stop what you’re doing or try something different. If she likes something, she wants you to do more of it until she gets over the mountain, so to speak.
Prepare for a Mess
The vagina is a self-lubricator, so don’t be surprised if the whole deed gets a bit messy. This means you did your job right, and she got wetter than usual during the act, or as is the case with some women, she is a rare female ejaculator (the kids call them squirters.)
In Conclusion
We can’t emphasize it enough; these tips and tricks are only your jumping off points to be an expert in the art of oral pleasure on your lady. Every woman is different, with slightly different equipment and different tastes, so the overarching key should be communication. Allow your partner to tell you (or show you) what she wants, and in return you will have given her the pleasure of a lifetime— and opened the door to some serious sexual karma for your own benefit.
Few women will turn down cunnilingus once they’re comfortable with you, so feel free to practice on anyone you become intimate with. If you’re having trouble finding oral sex test dummies (no offense, ladies: it’s only an expression), consider diving into an adult dating site to find horny women just waiting to feel your tongue’s talents.
Remember, in life you have to give to receive, and in bed it’s no different. Learn how to give your girl powerful orgasms with your god given equipment and ye shall be ever rewarded with pleasure yourself.
